If you ever want to make yourself crazy, try to meet four new online dating prospects in four consecutive days. I didn’t think when I was setting the dates that it would be a problem but it really was an awful idea. Anyone that has had any serious online action will tell you that sometimes it is difficult to keep the contestants straight in your head. It is hard to remember all the careers, hometowns, undergrad college, pets, parents, siblings, locations lived, favorite restaurants, past relationships, etc., about a number of people at once and not set yourself for some kind embarrassing gaffe. “So what are you getting your mom for Mother’s Day? Ohhhhh, that is right. You did tell me she was dead. My bad. Sorry about that.” I don’t like being a jerk so I try and remember things like deceased relatives but it can get to be tricky. A friend of mine is keeping a notebook with print-outs of emails and pictures and profiles of all of his paramours so he can brush up at a moments notice. I have learned that doing a quick email-history and profile review before the initial meet and greet to be very beneficial. Online dating = just like school. There will be homework.
Jeremy first emailed me because there is a photo on my profile of me carrying a tray of cheeseburgers at my favorite spot in Kauai. He said he could appreciate a girl that could pack away a burger or two. Well, I can appreciate someone that can appreciate a good appetite. We were going to get along just fine. I decided to stay with the Starbucks theme but I did agree to meet at one closer to his neck of the woods. I got there early which I was starting to realize was the best plan of attack. I like being able to get myself comfortable, use the restroom and have the guy be the one that walks in and has that awkward moment of wondering, hmmmm, does this person look anything like who I am supposed to meet? Are they looking at me expectantly?
Jeremy walked in a few minutes late but was very, very cute. Tall, very nice physique, glasses, snappily dressed – all good signs. I did notice as he was ordering his drink that he seemed to be a little…overheated. I saw a little sweat on his brow and there were possible signs of pit sweat through is t-shirt. Hmmmm… He earned some points, though, when he explained immediately after sitting down that he was still hot from a 10-mile run. He had, though, taken a shower. No need to worry. I find a guy that works out and takes care of himself to be very, very attractive. We were also meeting at 4:30 on a weekday which meant that he had a good enough job that they allowed him to exercise during normal work hours. Either that or he was unemployed but I definitely remember a job being mentioned. My fingers were crossed.
We had a very, very fun conversation. We were both into working out, good food, music, sports… I definitely felt a spark with him. We finished our coffee and said that he would be interested in meeting up again. Yay! Jeremy lived in West Seattle which is a cool area so we tentatively decided on that with details to be worked out online. I was excited as I drove away although the awkward ‘driving right behind me’ did occur. I hate it when someone you like or want to impress is in the car right behind yours and you have to pretend to be ‘nonchalant cool driver’. I did look back once and he was singing along to the radio. Nice, nice.
Jeremy emailed me the next day about coming down for dinner and/or drinks in a week or so and I happily agreed. We even had a pleasant phone conversation discussing our dining and recreational options. Things looked very promising so it was a bit of a surprise when, the day before we were supposed to hook up, I got a call from Jeremy. He had really enjoyed meeting me, he thought I was a great girl but he and his ex had been talking more and they had decided to give their relationship another go. Oh. Ok. I was taken a little aback but what could I say? I wished him luck, told him it was cool of him to call and he said that he would definitely be in touch should things change. I have to say that it was very admirable for him to man up and make the call. Most people, and I include myself in this group, would have felt totally appropriate doing that by email. Since this phone call with Jeremy I have used his line, not usually true, that I am trying to ‘take it to another level’ with someone as a reason for why no more dates can be had. Because of this, looking back, a large part of me thinks Jeremy was fibbing but why did he make the date with me in the first place if he wasn’t interested? He could have left it at coffee. I didn’t hear from him again so maybe he worked it out with his ex and they are living happily ever after or at least that is what I tell myself over a plate of cheeseburgers.